Monday 30 December
Flying home from lovely skiing holiday.
Cannot believe quantity of food have consumed over festive period. Wonder how much weight it is technically possible to put on in one day? If you ate the most fattening things you could think of without being sick or stopping, how long would it take the fat to grow, and how much could be produced at any one time? Therefore how much could be put on in seven days of same? Humph. Just asked Mark Darcy, who said I had to shut up or will tell air hostess to put me in jump seat. Anyway, life is going to be completely different when get back. Am not going to smoke or drink and am going to be much more on top of things with Mum. For example am going to tell her Mark Darcy and I cannot come to Una and Geoffrey Alconbury's New Year's Day Turkey Curry Buffet in poised and adult manner. Also am going to really take pleasure from just being at home putting photographs in albums instead of going out to 192 all the time.
Noon. Back In flat. Aargh. Terrified re ringing Mum. Last year Mum, Una and Elaine Darcy spent entire time at the Buffet trying to get me and Mark Darcy off with each other. Mark Darcy says reappearing as successfully-mated offspring would be not only intolerable (as we would be like pair of performing seals forced to have sex in front of assembled company etc), but irresponsible since Mum would spontaneously burst like Oscar Wilde with smugness then die, which would detract from festive atmosphere.
12.30. Just called Mum. "Oh hello, darling, how are you?" she trilled casually, apparently failing to notice my absence for entire Christmas period, "Hang on a tick. Just saying goodbye to Marjorie." She dropped her voice. "You know Ray and Marjorie, don't you, darling - they have hen huts. Marjorie was trying to get hold of this special hen for some unknown reason and... oooh hang on, the timer's off on the microwave."
She then left me sitting on the phone for nine minutes. After spending three minutes yelling, "Mum, Mum," I put the phone down only to have it ring back immediately.
"Bridget," Mum hissed dangerously, "Putting the phone down on another person is Very. Very. Rude..."
Wonder bra - "The composition of the image had such a textbook “sexist ad” dimension that one could be forgiven for supposing some familiarity with both cultural studies and with feminist critiques of advertising (Judith Williamson 1987)."
"taking feminism into account by showing it to be a thing of the past, by provocatively “enacting sexism” while at the same time playing with those debates in film theory about women as the object of the gaze (Laura Mulvey 1975) and even with female desire (Rosalind Coward 1984 Teresa de Lauretis 1988)."
Citroen - " This advert appears to suggest that yes, this is a self-consciously “sexist ad,” feminist critiques of it are deliberately evoked. Feminism is “taken into account,” but only to be shown to be no longer necessary. Why? Because there is no exploitation here, there is nothing remotely naı¨ve about this striptease. She seems to be doing it out of choice, and for her own enjoyment..."
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